I wrote this a while back for someone else explaining the differences between the words Broke/Damaged and their meaning in relation to addiction and what the definition the words actually mean. Drugs and materials are not the only things one can be addicted to. Behavior(s) / Thought Patterns also can be the center of an addiction.
It’s simple; people want what they want on their terms and they can’t handle being told no, so what better way than to lie?!? Lying to their-self. Lying to yourself is the same as “hating yourself.” Of course, you can hate yourself. People punish themselves all the time with behaviors, drugs, drinking, lying, and cheating. It all stems from FEAR. Yoda says it himself. “Fear leads to anger. Anger leads to hate. Hate leads to suffering.” This does not have to be on other people, but most of this does transcend to other people getting hurt.
No, I am talking about the fear consuming a person and they hate themselves for it. Again, Yoda… “Once you go down the dark path, forever will it dominate your destiny.” I know it’s a movie, but the words, the concept of the words of what Yoda is saying. Are they fantasy or do they bear some merit in logic of our thinking? I believe they do…
What we “want” and what we “need” will never be the same thing, in most cases, most!!! Minus the well being of your child. (In Most Cases) I do not want to debate those other circumstances. We are talking critical thinking here not finding holes in “a logic,” because it doesn’t fit what you might be used to, Religion/Politics/How one was raised. Save it for another time. A good parent will always need/want the well being of their child 1st. If one does need/want the same thing then they are considered an “addict” in said thing… Being Addicted to your kid is a real thing. Ask a lot of single mother’s out there????
Look at drug addicts… They want their fix and yet, they need their fix and look what eventually happens, it happens to them, all, you know. I have seen it for nearly 30 years… They all fall victim to the effects of wanting/needing the same thing at the same time. You can apply that same piece of philosophy to just about any sort of thinking and more times than not it’s correct, not always, but mostly…
Something about addicts is it doesn’t have to be a drug or anything, one can be addicted to a behavior, one can be addicted to certain thoughts, it can be intangible things… People are on autopilot these days and they hardly ever notice what is going on around them let alone what is actually happening to them… So much distraction with the Facebook’s, Instagram’s, Snapchat’s, Twitter’s of the world. We are so addicted to our Smart (dumb) Phones these days we are overly distracted to what is going on. Not just physically, but emotionally, spiritually, mentally and sometimes even sexually. It’s just a complete haze of miscommunications and unfinished thoughts…
People are absolutely addicted/comfortable with being “miserable” that is why some are not open to new/pleasurable experiences and/or people in their life… Every time someone tries they freak out and have to take some sort of anxiety pill. Well, we are supposed to be high strung and uncomfortable most of the time. Its called being Human… Deal with it. I say this a lot to people about being “COMFORTABLE WITH BEING MISERABLE!!!” I say it in almost every discussion about philosophy and psychology. People are terrified of change… Even me…
Some of the fault lies with concepts. Let’s look at how a word that implies a certain specific type of thing is broken down if the definition is correct/wrong. True or False…
***Taken from Webster Dictionary Online***
The statement is “Broken people cannot be fixed…” You have to look at the little things, the meaning of the word broke…
Broken – 1) Violently separated into parts. 2) Damaged or altered by breaking. A) Having undergone or been subjected to fracture. B) Being irregular, interrupted, or full of obstacles. C) Violated by transgression. D) Disrupted by change. 3) A) made weak or infirm. B) Subdued completely. C)Reduced in rank. 4) A) Cut off. B) Imperfectly spoken or written. 5) Not complete or full. 6) Disunited by divorce, separation, or desertion of one parent. And my favorite, when something is “broken” it is considered “un-fixable” meaning it cannot be fixed, it is now just a waste product.
Now the word “damaged” let’s see what Webster says about that word.
Damaged – 1) To cause damage. 2) It doesn’t say anywhere there about damaged not able to be fixed.
So my conclusion is; if someone is broken they are unfixable and if someone is damaged they can be fixed, but it doesn’t say how long and how much work it will take… I guess that is up to you to decide the person you are with if they are “broken” or if they are “damaged.”
If you are a woman these days and are in an abusive relationship and the guy is always saying he is “trying” to get better. Leave… Leave now while it’s easy. Makeup whatever excuse and just be done with it.
The word try implies failure. Men are supposed to be strong… In control of our emotions, our actions.. In control of our anger. If a guy’s ups and downs are soooooooooooooo out of whack and he cannot control his life/emotional state and the end result is blaming his girl and beating up on her…
Then NO, HE HAS NOT TRIED. He has utterly FAILED… Plus; the word try implies doubt and failure…
“Try not, do……..Do or do not, there is no try!” ~(More Yoda)…
Those few words destroy any man or woman that make excuses as to why things cannot get done.
Including Change.
People ask me all the time. “How do you get as motivated as you do? You wanna know how I do it? I doooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo, I do not try………………. I simply do……… The motivation comes the from confidence that I can, and I will, therefore all I have to do is do the work and the results will follow, eventually.
The answer is easy, but its a door one might not walkthrough. Again, Do………. You have to understand REAL TRUTH… The truth is, all the positive things one will say about their abusive guy are not true…
What is truth?
He treats you like shit, is that the result of hard work done to change someone’s mindset on how to treat their lover??? No, not at all… Wake up… The Haze… The great distraction has you…
Here is how you do it.
Like dismantling an Alien UFO to gain its secrets. You look at the end result and go backward… Reverse engineer your relationship. Start with the end result and go backward and see if that is what one wants in love and a relationship with this person. 1+1=2… If there is a negative result then what caused the negativity to begin with?
Remember YOU-CANNOT-FIX-BROKEN…
After all THIS SHIT… You should not feel that heartbroken or depressed. One should not come to be wanting to get high or drunk to distract them from their sadness.
Face it head-on…
You should feel relieved that you now are free to grow into a person like you should, naturally and maybe meet someone that respects you enough to not press for anything…
For
weeks… Let Love Grow…
Everyone is such in a damn hurry these days. Move-in together within weeks of knowing each other. Sex on the 1st night, guilty of that myself… That doesn’t mean the end, I am just saying why rush anything and everything. If it’s right, you have the rest of your lives to do all of these things and more.
I hope this helps all my lady friends that are mending broken hearts right now.
Hell, I can’t even get a date to show up when/where. The cheese stands alone, but I rather like cheese… A lot… NOM… NOM… My Door to my version of enlightenment is always open. All you have to do is walk through it. Well… Do…. Walk…Through that Door…